Appreciating What You've Got
Last weekend, almost 8,000 Zumba Instructors from around the world attended the Zumba convention in the US for four days of continuing education classes, fitness concerts, dance parties, and of course, connecting with new friends. I was lucky enough to make it to Florida for the convention the past two years, but decided to give it a miss this year because of another upcoming holiday trip to see my family. I had been really OK with my decision to skip this year, but as the photos, videos, and live streams of the events started popping up on social media, I felt that familiar feeling creeping in-- FOMO.
FOMO – or the Fear Of Missing Out—is one of those millennial acronyms I kept coming across over the past few years, and admittedly didn’t really know the meaning of (I’m blaming my living in Taiwan for over a decade for some of my ignorance). For those of you as disconnected from pop culture as I am, it’s a term used to talk about the fear that you will miss out on something huge if you don’t participate in an experience: your friend’s party at KTV, your sibling’s picturesque vacation, or an instagram worthy meal at a hot, new restaurant. It’s generally a feeling that is made worse when looking at exciting, shiny, carefully curated and airbrushed social media posts.
While it’s awesome to see what the people we care about are up to, it can often create a feeling of jealousy, as the things happening in our own life suddenly seem lackluster in comparison. I know that I might see friends’ posts of suburban houses and kids’ soccer games, and second guess my choice to live abroad, while others may see photos of me in Taipei and think the freedom and adventure of my lifestyle are enviable. Most of us don’t share the tiresome, boring, or difficult aspects of our daily life-- the result being that we what we see online is only a “highlight reel” rather than reality.
A part of human nature is sometimes wanting what others have and thinking that “the grass is greener on the other side.” But if we get too wrapped up focusing on FOMO and what others have, it often distracts from appreciating what is right in front of us. As in combatting any kind of jealousy , gratitude for what you already have is key. Staying in the moment and taking time to notice even your smallest blessings can bolster happiness, instead of feeding inadequacy, resentment, or sadness.
This past week, I consciously tried to stop myself from going full-blown FOMO from missing the convention by appreciating the classes and students I have in Taipei all that much more. I was able to feel happy for my friends who were attending the convention and focus on my own trip to see my family next week! I'm extremely grateful that I'll be able to travel back to the US to spend valuable time with my loved ones so soon. Not being together with my family for a visit was the kind of FOMO I knew in this case was too important to ignore!
Please remember classes will be cancelled 8/3- 8/13 while I am away. Can’t wait to see you when I’m back!
Keep moving!
xx,
Katie
珍惜你所擁有
上週末來自全世球8000多位的 Zumba 老師一起聚集在佛羅里達州的奧蘭多參加4天的Zumba 大會,大家一起繼續接受訓練、參加健身演唱會與舞蹈派對、還有認識新朋友。前兩年我很幸運可以一起參加,但是因為今年夏天要回美國家庭聚會,所以就決定今年暫停一次。自從我做了個決定之後,我一直都覺得很OK,直到在社群媒體上開始頻頻出現的活動照片、影片、直播等等,我感受到一個熟悉的不安感慢慢佔據了我的心頭------現在千禧世代常見的文明病:錯失良機恐慌症 FOMO。
我必須承認過去幾年我常常看到這個縮寫,但都不是很了解它的意思(也許是因為我住在台灣超過十年以上,所以沒有太關注這些新潮的術語)如果你也和我一樣,不是很接軌現在的流行文化,錯失良機恐慌症指的是當你沒有參加到一個活動或是擁有某種經驗,你總覺得錯失了一個很大的機會:不管是你朋友們在KTV開趴、你的兄弟姊妹出國旅行留下的藝術照片、或是一道當紅餐廳的精緻料理,基本上就是當你在社群媒體上看著別人光鮮亮麗的照片,卻讓你有不如他人的感覺。
當然能看到自己關心的人最近在做些什麼是一件很棒的事,但是它同時也會帶來比較的心情,讓你突然覺得自己的生活乏善可陳。
我知道我可能會看到朋友的貼文,看到他們郊區的房子,孩子們的足球比賽,然後開始懷疑自己選擇在國外生活的決定;相對的,我的朋友可能看到我在台北生活的照片,會覺得這樣的自由又冒險的生活型態是多麼令人羨慕。大家很少會分享無聊、疲憊或是遇到困難的生活日常,所以我們看到的貼文往往都是每一個人人生中的精彩片段,而不是他們的真實生活。
想要別人擁有的是人類的本性,總是想著「國外的月亮比較圓」。如果你深陷錯失良機恐慌症,總是想要別人所擁有的,你就會看不到或是忘記感激自己所擁有的。
關於要如何對抗忌妒,關鍵就是真心地感謝你所擁有的。活在當下並花時間去感謝你所擁有的一切,可以幫助你創造幸福感來取代悲傷或是覺得「自己不夠好」的感受。
這過去的一週,我不斷地、也很有意識地提醒自己感謝每一堂課與所有參與的學生,來避免自己陷入錯失良機恐慌症。經過這次的嘗試,我發現我開始期待和家人的假期,同事我也很替所有去參加 Zumba 大會的朋友開心,畢竟如果真的錯失這次和家人的聚會,這樣的的恐懼會是我無法面對的。
再次提醒大家 8/3~8/13 停課因為我在美國,期待回來再次見到大家~~
繼續前進!
愛你的 Katie
( Anna Liang 譯 )
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